Someone hits you with a weapon and drags you down the street.
You bleed.
You fall down on your knees, whimpering and trembling. You know that help is only one call away, but you cannot find your voice. You slowly crawl out to the streets, and you collapse as soon as you manage to find help. They take you, rush you to the hospital, and finally you’re treated. Time passes, the scars fade away and you heal.
Someone hits you with words, and drags you down to their level, and beats you there with experience.
They haven’t broken your bones, but they’ve broken your spirit. They snatch away your composure, make your confidence shrivel and you roll up into a ball of damage and hurt. They’ve eroded your self esteem, leaving you fearful and like everything was your fault, but in the end it wasn’t. It was abuse.
Let’s be clear. You are not all that is thrown at you. You are being abused, and verbal abuse is just as bad as any other form of abuse.
And in fact, unlike physical abuse, the scars of verbal abuse are not visible. They can be difficult to identify, but they stay and they stay for life.
You can call a woman in your workplace or your home cheap, mean things, and while that reflects on the kind of upbringing that you’ve had, it also reflects on how you see yourself, and not the woman you are cussing at.
We talk about physical abuse. We know hitting a woman is wrong. But little do we know that the hidden hurt, left by verbal abuse strikes much, much deeper.
I know this it is kind of late to be up and writing here, but it’s been a tough day for me, and I know that the only way to let my steam off these days, is to write it out, cuz it’s hard to guess what people might turn into.
A few hours ago, I had a classmate throw a very cheap comment while the entire batch was discussing about an important issue going on in the class.
What worried me wasn’t the words he used. It was the fact that he justified and took credit for all the filth that came out of his mouth this night, and he did not even have the courtesy to apologize.
It’s disheartening, when you find such uncivilized actions, being justified, with arrogance and pride.
When confronted by other classmates, all that the abuser had to say was this: ‘I was in a bad mood today, and I was already mad.’ and ‘If I wanted, I could’ve cursed at her more, but I didn’t, right?’ and several other infuriatingly lethargic replies, as if he was doing us a favor.
Men use cheap language when they feel spineless and cannot defend themselves with right action and justifications. And men use cheap language when they feel their vocabulary dwindling and that they cannot let a woman speak sense into their minds.
Verbal abuse is a difficult emotional problem, that we seldom speak of.
I know I have a reasonable number of followers here, and I want to know of your opinion. What would you do, if you find someone verbally abusing a girl, in private or in front of while bunch of people, just because she spoke of her opinion?
Why is it that a girl, who is your classmate and colleague, suddenly becomes a whore, slut or a bitch, just because she defended her opinion, just as much as you did?
What do you think is the problem here, with our men, and especially in our country, that we think verbal abuse, especially pertaining to a woman, is considered casual and they do not even have the courtesy to take responsibility?
All that I have to say to them is this:
Your mother must be so proud of you right now.
Good night.
XOXO,
Bala.
To follow the author on Facebook. Click Here.
To Follow the author on Twitter, Click Here.
Bala karthiga M 
Leave a reply to Ajaz Ahmed Cancel reply